X games

The x games are just ridiculous. These athletes are always overcoming, surpassing themselves in a fashion that my College professor would refer to as 'straight nietzchian'. Each year the tricks these athletes do are more ridiculous than the last year. Twice as high, twice as fast, twice as many rotations. I just watched Sean white score a 100 on his last showrooms run. In what other type of sport are you declared 'perfect'?

Headphones

Just bought a pair of new headphones.  I went with this style:

I figure that these will have good sounds, be usable for either portable physical activities or computer use, and the cord isn't very long (I hate long cords)

I thought about going with one with wireless technology:  

These have a very minimalist sort of appeal and it would be sweet to cruise around the house, unconnected to any wires, jamming out to my own soundtrack.  But I figured it wasn't worth the extra cost.

I also saw these really strongly advertised:

Who the hell buys these things?  They cost around $300.  I'm didn't look at the specs but I'm convinced that they have no special utility and they are only selling because white kids think its cool to buy into the Dr. Dre gangster rap image.


I just can't wait til the day we can implant a thin flexible microfilm over our earbuds and funnel in news, music, and phone calls straight into the cochlear.  But until our cyborg technology gets better I'll have to settle for regular headphones.

We must protect our authority

These damn bunnies keep venturing into our orchard in my family's backyard and eating our crops.  I feel you Elmer Fudd, these waskly wabbits have got to go.  But how to keep them away?  Tactics range from the humane to the downright dastardly.  Apparently a natural trick is to plant marigolds around the crops you wish to protect because the bad smell wards them off.  But yesterday my pops found a little haired-devil sitting right on a flower munching on a head of lettuce.

I suppose we could trap them too.  Perhaps set out some delicious roofie-laden hay grass or tie up metal cages on ropes and lay out trip wires to spring the automatic traps and send the cages hurtling down around the rabbits.  But now we're getting into some complicated road-runner Acme gadget technology that seems like a bit too much work for easy-going summer living.  And what would we do when we caught the bunnies?  I say we should eat them up since i've personally never nommmed on delicious wild bunnies before (profuse apologies to my veg-head friends).  Or maybe we could keep them as delicious, woops I mean adorable, pets.

The last option is the most deadly, death or mortal wounding by shooting.  That doesn't really bother me but the difficulty comes in if we almost kill them but they manage to live on.  I can't have a weeping, almost-mortally wounded bunny on my conscience.  I may be morally flexible but i'm not a sociopath!  Thoughts?  Suggestions?  General abuse and mockery?